Real Me

Let’s see Who is the real me? Is the face I’m wearing today a mask? Or the real thing? I know I have this flesh And it’s disgusting So all the things it lusts for Try to creep into my inner being Then I try to start surrendering things In the hopes that I’ll stay clean Wait, wait... get clean Can I even do that? There goes another thought I shouldn’t think like that Oops there slipped another word I shouldn’t speak like that Read another book And listen to this pastor See Maybe one day you can be “taught “ how to be free But wait, doesn’t the Bible make it seem easy Just love people And serve the needy Believe and know that Jesus saved me Then just walk in the light like it’s nothing Sure thing, sounds grand But there’s still a few things I don’t understand Oh wait, I forgot longsuffering You know the stuff that’s supposed to be defining So here it goes again the questions in my head Tossing fire back and forth Feel like I can’t share things Not many think like me I can already sense they wouldn’t receive it So should I even believe it I see both sides of every fence And neithers grass is greener But I know that at the end of ones side there’s a pasture And the other way is just torture and disaster So I just make my choices to the best of my ability Who knows if I’ll ever figure out the real me I’ll just keep praying and hoping And believing In what I can’t see That’s the only thing that makes any sense to me The only thing that gives my soul and spirit a sense of security Thank Goodness I have a God that loves me enough to wait patiently I’m going to have to let you go now Because I have a lot to figure out about me.