You remind me that “belief is a powerful key”
But I don’t know how to believe
When it cannot be formed in me
I only have myself to blame
For letting shit remain the same
I felt my tears stream down my face
Yet still I did not do a thing
I wish my tactics for control were less in vain
Instead I starved myself despite the pain
Skin on bones is quickly what I became
Deteriorating day by day
Somehow lost in the illusion that
If
If I could just fit in this idealistic mold
To which I had made
Then people would love me
And all would be okay
For I didn’t need to know my own worth
As long as everyday I received
An endless supply of flattering words
Yet I could feel my soul begin to turn to shade
Everyday I felt my life start to go away
Piece by piece fragments of who i was
Began to fade
Yet still I continued to pray
Beg for my god to take it away
at least free me from some of my pain
Nonetheless each day felt the same
A cycle bound to replay
Until finally I simply lost my faith
