Tonight, before the moon
drops dead insomnia
on my skin
I want to write
and plug myself in
to the world
yet to discover
but always exists
inside of myself
I scrub myself so
the sounds of this ocean
will bring some peace
to my pores
I was searching for a meaning
but instead I got lost
inside of my bones
I have been crying
without knowing
what is exactly there
I stoped asking questions
and I start saying the truth
I then realised
that crying itself
is a form of releasing
whatever your whatever was
and as I pull memories
stuck in my eyelashes
every time I blinked
the world was hard to be seen
oh, that was heavy!
it seems that every tear
is a way of washing
the wounds you could see
so close and kept them
holding into them
as it was part of you
no, it’s not
nah, don’t listen to the world
that is trying so hard
and forgets to be
crying it is never
weakness
crying is the bravest thing
you could do
when you can’t do anything
crying is the mile away
that is between giving up
and trying again
crying is a form of praying
when you drop yourself on the floor
and keep telling yourself
“ I am so tired of being strong”.
crying is the cleaning lady
of your body home
that your ego looks down to
but eventually realises
it cleaned your whole
and now you can breath
I know, sometimes
it so hard to cry.
the history of letting those tears
just be
was poisoned by the people
that gave you everything
so you can’t stop crying
so, now the core
of knowing
that crying
was always
a part of seeing your grief
and grieving together
all at once
without numbing the pain
without running away
without fooling yourself
was cut off since you turned four
and kept hearing
“stop crying, you are not a baby anymore”.
today, let yourself feel
the tiredness
the sadness
the loneliness
the betrayal
the foreigners
feel the collapsing
where the scream of your voice
isn’t loud enough
because for so long
you couldn’t show
how you feel
because for so long
you chose to be strong
feel the betrayal
numbing yourself all
because the only place
you could rest your souls home
it was ruined
and broken
with the punches
of the only man
who was supposed to be safe
feel the emptiness
taking over your spine
because you don’t have anyone
who to call
feel the pain
choking your life
dragging your down
because every time you get up
it comes back
feel it all
cry it all
scream so loud
scream your body out
scream your wounds out
scream your soul
all out
it was stuck in you
for way too long
and cry it all way down
wash yourself in the tears
of your own soul
of your inner child
of your own past
cry until there isn’t any memories
stuck inside your skin
cry until the lungs of your soul
can pass a breath all the way in
cry because today
you chose to try again
and even though it feels
like you doing nothing
well, my friend
you do
crying is the bridge
that you drag your wounded body
just so you can move over
crying is the hope
of healing yourself
and coming back home
crying is the hope
that you didn’t leave
your whole body home
forever
and as I sit here
with you
watching your grief
I want to tell you
that you are the strongest
that you are the bravest
that you are the one
the world chose to see
and as I sit here
and cry myself too
to whatever it is
take a deep breathe
dear you, we’ve got this
now rebuilt yourself again
and build your own home
and whenever you search for peace
dive yourself in
to your address soul
there is river that is so still
you could see the past and the future
all in its presence
so sacred
so still
and nothing that really matters
will make any sense
and nothing that really is
will fade away
and your pain will be covered
in a bliss of relief
and each sunrise
will guide you
to the reason why you exists
and each sunrise will show you
how to forgive
all you need to do
let yourself cry
let yourself grief
