I feel like I’m losing control, like I’m going to explode, like the world around me just doesn’t make sense anymore. I can’t remember what it feels like to be happy. I feel like all this pain and anguish is going to flow out of me and spill into my son. I might be going insane, worrying about the same thing every single day. But he is the one throwing his life away, I have no control either way. The only way I can heal is by letting you go, saying goodbye, even though the thought of it makes me want to explode.
